Baseball is Baseball

The Metsies went down with a cold, to the power of 5, (but that doesn’t matter, wink, wink, nudge, nudge). Nothing could hold down this raging bull, (except perhaps a bull-like calf). The Mets are sitting comfortably in third place but knowing the Amazins, we could go down to sixth place before you can say, “That’s not possible.” After we missed the Subway Series, some Yankees fans could say, “They infected themselves because they’re scared of us.” But why would the Mets be scared of their crosstown rivals? You know how all teams have a taxi squad (a makeshift minor league team), the Yanks should have a doctor squad, equipped with cots, surgeons, 1,000 casts, and half a hospital’s inventory, so, Bronx Babies, go to sleep, it’s your bedtime.

There’s a big conversation about unwritten rules after the single most electric player in the MLB Fernando Tatis Jr. swung 3-0 and hit a grand slam to right center. Like there are some unwritten rules that you should follow, don’t talk about a no-hitter while in progress, don’t draw a line in the dirt to anger the umpire (unless you’re Bryce Harper, if you’re him, go ahead), don’t admire a home run too much, don’t wait 14 years to make the next pitch, and, my biggest pet peeve, don’t quick pitch, it’s so annoying, (and if you’re doing it 0-2, I don’t care if we’re in Little League, Major League, or the Assisted Living Facility League, I’m charging the mound and we’re throwing hands). But, swinging 3-0? Go ahead, you do you. Play for the tie at home? NO, always play for the win, no matter the circumstances. Stealing a base up big? Go ahead, pad your stats, the losing team isn’t going to win anyway, why is that even a question?

The Boston Red Sox are getting manhandled by every single team that they play. They were thrown by the scruff of their neck into last place and forced to stay there. The Dodgers’ expectations were low this season because people thought Mookie Betts was going to be a bust. But, Mookie turned out great!

In this asterisk season, there’s no room for mistakes, that’s why it shouldn’t be dubbed as a real season. There should always be room and time to fix mistakes. This season is a sprint, not a marathon, whereas all seasons are marathons. That’s what makes teams good, all the time. Despite not having fans in the stands, there are still always the bozos and still always the superstars and still always the competitive games. Weird anemic stats, and then surprisingly good teams, like the Giants, who are the Midgets everywhere anytime. My point being, baseball is baseball, even if it’s a little different.